A Conversation in the Servants Hall
by A True Book Thief
Summary: Thomas walks in the servants hall one night when he's restless and sees Daisy sitting at the table. He sits with her and they began to talk. Without fully knowing at first, they both have a lot in common.


OoOoOoOoOoO

Daisy rolled her fingers in and out of the path of the candles flame absentmindedly as she thought about the day, she stood by watching as Jimmy and Alfred flirted endlessly with Ivy. She didn't know why she felt so alone, she had friends and people had proved they cared about her but she wanted more. She wanted to love and be loved in return. She sighed and dropped her hand to the table next to the abandoned price if bread she stole from the pantry.

Thomas turned on his side and tried in vain to go to sleep. Seconds, minutes, hours passed by and he still couldn't get tired. His mind always tortured him at times like this with memories of the war and with a past from before then he would rather leave forgotten. He could feel sleep wouldn't come any time soon so he quietly got out of bed, grabbed his robe and walked down to the kitchen.

Thomas walked down the hall from the kitchen and stopped in the doorway leading to the servants hall. He was never one to be easily startled but seeing the small kitchen maid sitting at the servants table acting as though this was an everyday occurrence surprised him in a way he couldn't explain.

"Daisy what on earth are you doing up?" He asked a little harsher than he expected.

"I could say the same for you." She bit back.

"I couldn't sleep." He said and held up his water glass. As he was about to leave he stopped and took her in. She was slumped over with a look of undescribable sadness on her face. _Go upstairs, _he thought to himself, _go to bed. Daisy can take care of herself._ He had seen her sad before but never like this, never so depressed. With a sigh he turned around and sat down in the chair in front of her.

"Are you okay?" He asked when she looked up at him with confusion.

"Why do you care?" She bit back, with a tone he had never heard her use.

"Don't need to get mean, I was only askin'." He said and contemplated leaving her.

"I'm sorry. Its been a hard day." She mumbled.

"Is it Alfred?" He questioned, smirking when she looked up.

"How do you know that?" She demanded, her cheeks turning a deep red. Whether it was anger or embarrassment she didn't know.

"Anyone with eyes can see, Daisy." He laughed a little.

With a sigh she nodded slowly and looked down at the candle's flame. She didn't know how to describe what she was feeling.

"Have you ever been in love, Mr. Barrow?" She said reasoning the only way he would understand was if he felt love himself.

"Well..." he hesitated, he didn't know how to explain to the small innocent girl in front of him what happened without giving himself away. She stared up at him with questioning eyes and he knew he had to say something. Trying to work his way around saying any genders he tried his best "During the war...When I worked at the hospital...There was someone I met."

He had to admit he was slightly proud of himself. During the war many nurses came from many different places to help with the smaller country hospitals. Thomas felt like he could easily get away with saying that.

"Was it a soldier?" She asked him and for a minute his blood ran cold. _Someone_ _told her,_ he thought as he tried to do damage control and put on his normal facade , _who? _

His eyes widened for a moment when she suddenly laughed, "Anyone with eyes can see, Mr. Barrow."

He was caught deciding if she was going to say anything or if she was going to keep her mouth shut. He would admit knowing what he was would not benefit her in any way but still.

"Were you in love then?" She asked, sensing that it was a touchy subject and not to probe further.

"No. But I felt like we could have been." He almost whispered feeling like he was being attacked by the memories of Edward Courtney. He barely knew him but other _was _something there.

"What happened?" She said quietly. She had never seen him like this, so full of sadness. Whoever it was broke his heart bad, Daisy thought seeing the hurt on his face.

"They died." He said simply as though the bluntness of the words would dull the pain. He looked up at her when she took her hand in his. He realized that it was jot a romantic gesture but a friendly one. He squeezed back for just a moment then she slid from his grasp.

"Its hard losing someone so close to you." There was a break in her voice and Thomas knew immediately she was talking of William.

"It is." He agreed, taking a moment to think of what might have been.

"Do you ever think of him...William?" She inquired wondering if people thought about him as she often did.

"Only when I see Alfred and Jimmy fighting." He joked and she laughed.

"They do fight like you two used to." She giggled.

"Worse," he laughed and she stopped.

"You actually think they fight less?" She said and he gave her a steady look.

"I know they do" he argued.

She shook her head and continued with a laugh, "I don't remember Alfred and Jimmy ever getting into a fist fight and breaking a bunch of plates."

When he remembered he laughed too and felt his face grow hot. "I forgotten about that."

It was quiet for a moment then she began to laugh. Slowly, starting as a giggle then gradually getting bigger so big he couldn't help joining.

"If we're any louder we'll get yelled at," he whispered and they tried to suppress the laughs. She sighed and began rolling her fingers through the single flame again.

"I wouldn't compare myself to Ivy if I were you." He said still laughing.

"Why?" She looked up and blushed.

"I doubt anyone as strong or brave could endure what you did when Mrs. Patmore was losing her sight." He said, feeling accomplished when she put a hand to her mouth to muffle her laughs. He didnt know when he'd ever been this carefree around someone. Even his friendship with Jimmy was in its early stage and it was spent walking on eggshells.

"I would never have done what you did, Mr. Barrow," she replied, "I don't think I could ever take a beating like you did. No matter how much I loved him."

The servants hall was encased in silence after a moment and they both were left to their thoughts. He knew she wasn't saying it against him. It more or less sounded like she was okay with it. She was adorned with the same far off look she had when he discovered her and he knew she was thinking about Alfred.

"Daisy," he said seriously then stopped unknowing how to word it. The look in her eye when she talked of Alfred was one of hurt but also hope. Something he thought he had with the Duke, he wanted her to be happy, honestly. He didn't want this girl have any more hurt. "Are you sure you love him?"

She didn't need to hesitate, just nodded sadly. He reached over this time, grabbed her hand he felt her squeeze tight. As they sat there they both realized the other knew what they were going though. There was a moment in time they thought they were in love with someone that was using them for personal gain. His was the duke, hers was him, something he regretted so much now. They both had someone important taken from them. His was Edward, hers was William. They both loved someone they couldn't have. Hers was Alfred, his was Jimmy. Both had so much heartbreak inside them. Both were lonely.

"Thank you, Thomas." She mumbled still not letting go of his hand. Neither noticed she abandoned all formality with the underbutler. She yawned and stood up. It was then he realized how tired he was. He walked her to the steps and stopped when he realized they were still holding hands. Even then it didn't seem romantic. It was like a comforting gesture a woman would use on her child.

"Goodnight, Daisy." He mumbled and let go, sharing a smile one last time he said, "It'll get better."

"Goodnight, Thomas." She mumbled back and they went their separate ways without so much as a glance backward. As both crawled into bed they found sleep came much easier.

Daisy watched as Mrs. Patmore yelled at Ivy for messing up part of the sauce and having to stop what she was doing to fix her mistake. She nearly laughed at Ivy's flustered expression. She shook her head and quietly sent an amused look to Thomas who she could almost see smirking back at her just before he was called up to the families dinner. She didn't feel as bad as she did yesterday. She felt like she she could endure it all.

'Thank you, Thomas,' she thought to herself, 'Its strange to have you for a friend, but nice all the same.'

OoOoOoO

I'm rewatching the series and noticed they had a lot in common when it came to relationships. So here's a fic about it! Please review, thank you fellow Downton Abbey fans!

-book thief


End file.
